OT: A note of loss and thanks

Captain Quirk · #1 10/05/2007, 03:44 PM

This may be a foreign thought to many of you, however I suspect that a lot of you would probably be able to relate.

When people generally start their lives together, they typically have pets. If there are no human children around, those pets become as dear to the owners as if they WERE their children.

About an hour ago, I did my duty as a caretaker and put my oldest cat to sleep. He was 20 (although I coulda sworn he was older), and lived a very, very good life. He was loved and cared for and was a major part of our family, even after we started having children. Our pets are also an integral part of their lives, as it should be. Our children are being raised to have respect and compassion for our pets and other animals, again, as it should be.

I took him outside and let him roll around in the grass for a bit this morning; he always likes to walk through the grass as though he is a tiger, or something. We spent quite a bit of time out there, him rolling around and strolling around the yard. I also got a couple of photos.

One thing that I do for the comfort of my animals is I am ALWAYS there with them, holding them, when they are put down. I held him in my arms today, fed him treats, and stroked his head and neck. It was the usual, quick passing that I have come to know; the fairly instantaneous muscle relaxation, and the stopped breathing and/or purring. It sucks - its REEEALY hard to be there for! - but they deserve it.

I was happy that I was able to have him share almost half my life with me, and that he was able to be a part of my childrens upbringing, as well. For that I am very, very thankful.

The other thing I am thankful for is related. Kinda.

Yesterday (this morning, actually) there was a chat going on on another board where one it it's members was basically going to town on me. CONSTANT berating, name calling and abuse. I mean, REALLY over the top... He went after me with BOTH BARRELS and was relentless in his attempts to enrage me with illogical bantering, name calling, misrepresentations and innuendo. Logic had no place in dealing with him, although I tried. Too long...

Anyway, I mentioned that I was going to be off today so that I could take my cat to be put down.

Me: "Taking a vacation day... If yo must know, I have to put down a cat that I;ve had for 23 years tomorrow..."

Bergevoy: "oh my god, stop the presses, the business world bowes down to a dead cat of 23 years... wow... i bet the japs dont let that happen too ofter, and we call ourselve comptitive"

Later...

Me: "You are mean spiteful petty and vindictive, Bill..."

Bergevoy: "hmmm more name calling... how cool you are loosening up must be ready to wake up to go bury the cat"

Later...

Me: "We have steering committee meetings and we invite the public."

Bergevoy: "and a moron, and you will be all nice and beat while you mourn your son, i mean cat..."

Later...

Me: "I always stay with them when they are put down. I hold them."

Bergevoy: "you are trying roast him".

I do not intend to cause discourse with this message. To the contrary, I wish to express my jubilation that Bergevoy has once again been removed from this board.

Mods, THANK YOU for removing a force which is negative to this board and to this hobby. I do not mind debate - I enjoy and welcome it. I do not think it is appropriate, however, to EVER berate and call someone names if they do not share your point of view.

I thank you for allowing me this message. I hope it is not found to be inappropriate.

Again I am thankful to whatever forces allowed me to share such a large portion of my live with this wonderful animal.

And I hope I touched on a feeling of love for our animals that many of us share...

Him sleeping on the couch yesterday morning: http://i124.photobucket.com/albums/p...s/DSCN0948.jpg

He and I this morning: http://i124.photobucket.com/albums/p...s/DSCN0954.jpg

rockindacheeks · #2 10/05/2007, 03:53 PM

i know exactly how you feel. well kinda. 2 years ago we had to put down our 18 year old cat, i was 4 when we got her and she was my best friend growing up. She only liked me out of my family. It was really sad when we put her down, but she lived a great life.

Captain Quirk · #3 10/05/2007, 03:56 PM

Most of our animals live to be about 20... We try to take good care of them and give them a good home.

But we have to do what we have to do... Some people just let them die no matter how miserable... It was his time.

I miss his toenails clicking on the kitchen floor already...

Thanks for the note.

roxy25 · #4 10/05/2007, 03:57 PM

aww man your going to make me cry I had to put down my pet this year. She meant the world to me !

I know how you feel about your pets. They should not be taken for granted at all.

I didn't even know why Bill got banned that was really messed up on what he was saying to you......

Bebo77 · #5 10/05/2007, 03:59 PM

I know just you feel.. i lost my cat of 22 years and dog of 12 years a few years ago, its never easy...

by the way, thats why i dumped the other site.. i am through dealing with that man and a site that has no moderation

Captain Quirk · #6 10/05/2007, 04:03 PM

Lots of people think he's the cats meow (no pun intended).

My view is that nobody should be allowed to talk to people like that and stay active on the boards...

Glad you noted his behavior, but I really don't want this thread to turn into another "As the Polyps Open"... We all know the deal. We can leave it at that.

Yes, the loss is tough. Seems I've had to deal with that 3 times in about the last 4 years... The next round won't be for another 15 or so (unless one of the horses gets sick, that is, and who KNOWS about THAT scenario...).

Hope you have a good weekend.

glaudds · #7 10/05/2007, 04:04 PM

Sorry for your loss. Don't even bother with those insensitive, ignorant people, not worth your time or effort.

Captain Quirk · #8 10/05/2007, 04:08 PM

TY for your thoughts. Appreciated...

jkreefer · #9 10/05/2007, 04:21 PM

In the second photo, it seems as though there are tears in both yours, and your cats eyes. Very touching and sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing.

roxy25 · #10 10/05/2007, 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Captain Quirk
Lots of people think he's the cats meow (no pun intended).

My view is that nobody should be allowed to talk to people like that and stay active on the boards...

Glad you noted his behavior, but I really don't want this thread to turn into another "As the Polyps Open"... We all know the deal. We can leave it at that.

Yes, the loss is tough. Seems I've had to deal with that 3 times in about the last 4 years... The next round won't be for another 15 or so (unless one of the horses gets sick, that is, and who KNOWS about THAT scenario...).

Hope you have a good weekend.

If I actually cared to read his post , then I would have known about this sooner ...

You have horses ?!?!

Captain Quirk · #11 10/05/2007, 04:24 PM

Yup... 5 of the hay burners...

*sigh*

FIVE of them...

*sobs quietly*

roxy25 · #12 10/05/2007, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Captain Quirk
Yup... 5 of the hay burners...

*sigh*

FIVE of them...

*sobs quietly*

Thats cool !

I have found it harder to lose my dog when I only had one dog. I had to put down 2 dogs before Kayla. Brownie my 14 year old red rottie and then KZ a 4 year old GSD I adopted from the shelter.

I also had to put down a cat last year. Its hard to do

Captain Quirk · #13 10/05/2007, 04:34 PM

But we gotta do what we gotta do.

I'm not looking forward to it when it's a horse. Those are the wifes and she is REEEEALY attached to them... She doesn't handle grief well. Not at all.

Not sure I do either, frankly...

Tonight's family night. We're gonna make a fire and sit around and not watch TV and just be a family. My kids are gonna be pretty worked up for a while, I'm sure. Especially my youngest... it'll hit her pretty hard.

clsund · #14 10/05/2007, 04:40 PM

Sorry to hear about your cat.

Captain Quirk · #15 10/05/2007, 04:42 PM

*smiles*

Thank you...

BurntOutReefer · #16 10/05/2007, 04:48 PM

Feel your grief mate....was in UK on a trip when my 13 year old Dobie died...couldn't come home till after his funeral...(dont laugh)....

Captain Quirk · #17 10/05/2007, 04:56 PM

Not laughing at all... I totally understand. Respect and consideration for all things is important. Even if it is "only" a 4 legged friend...

gcarroll · #18 10/05/2007, 04:57 PM

Bruce, sorry for you loss. After 23 years it has become part of your life.

Brian Koyama · #19 10/05/2007, 04:58 PM

Sorry to hear about your loss Capt. Quirk. I've had two of my dogs die in my arms so I know how you feel.

derrikd · #20 10/05/2007, 05:00 PM

im sorry for your loss and sorry about some people out there..

wishntoboutside · #21 10/05/2007, 05:01 PM

bruce,

so sorry to hear the news i knew you were upset about the cat in an ealier discussion. your photo however did bring tears to my eyes seeing the emotions that you are going through.
you are so right about pets becoming your kids, my beloved pug sharkbiat is the world to me. At times it seems like the dog is the only one on my side especially after going through a break up after four years. my pets bring me happiness everyday and i guess i am lucky that i can take him to work with me at times.

side note... i too will be staying away from so cal reefs for some time. i guess we can all leave that site for those that have been banned for not obeying the rules. since there are none on that site.

Engine 7 · #22 10/05/2007, 05:01 PM

Hello from Chicago. I came across your post and almost cried, the second picture of you and your cat together was intense. It could easily be me.
Anyway, sorry to hear about your cat, we have 2 here and love them.
I have seen Bergevoy's act before on this board and cant stand him or the way he acts.
Things will get better, you will see

Captain Quirk · #23 10/05/2007, 05:02 PM

Thanks, all. Much appreciated...

Gonna grab a bite and spend time with the family. it;s a mourning process for all of us...

Hope you all have a good night.

pookstreet · #24 10/05/2007, 05:06 PM

Sorry for your loss Bruce. I wished everyone had the same compassion for all living things as you do, whether it's the 2 or 4 legged variety.

TrojanScott · #25 10/05/2007, 05:26 PM

Sorry for your loss. I understand how some people just don't get it... it's easy to understand when you realize they have no souls.

I had to put down my rottie in April, he was almost 9 years old. My best friend on earth, and I still miss him dearly. Putting him down and being there was the single hardest thing I've ever had to do.

Totally understand how you feel, and wish you and your family the best. Hang in there.