ATTN: LFS employees

[Hormigaquatica]

Originally posted by Absint Reefer
on multiple occasions people have came in and told me their water kept disappearing so they took their tank down. I told them that Adam west has the same problem

Now thats funny..

[Aaarrrggg]

Originally posted by Absint Reefer
on multiple occasions people have came in and told me their water kept disappearing so they took their tank down. I told them that Adam west has the same problem

Hehehehe

[jmicky41]

Customer: What kind of fish is this?
Me: Watchman goby.
Customer: Why do they call it that?
Me: What is it doing?
Customer: It is watching me.

--

Customer: My fish jumped out of the tank and I stepped on it, can I have a new one?

[zhenjw]

Originally posted by gregg@AMS
that reminds me of a good one.

i worked at an aquarium installation/service company which shall remain nameless. anyway, we "installed" a tank that had the filtration in the lower level. well, the boss wanted several return lines going into the tank, so he essentially manifolded right out of the pump, and split it into 8 separate 1/2" lines that went 16' vertical and about 35' horizontal. needless to say, the water trickled ino the tank.

so,we filled it up w/ fresh water and ran the system to do a leak test. then, the next day we added salt by mixing it at a high concentration and adding it to the sump. a few days later we took a few fish over, but before adding them, we test the salinity.

well, we dipped the hydrometer in and got no reading. did it again, same thing....0. we were like . well, i was walking by the front of the tank, and when i looked in, i saw a perfect lens serarating the freshwater from the salt. the flow going into the tank was so slow that the more dense hyper-saline just sank in the freshwaterr. it couln't even mix the water.

Halocline....awsome. there's an episode of Planet Earth on caves, and they have these divers swimming through a halocline, looks so trippy.

[NeveSSL]

Wow... this thread is an INCREDIBLY AWESOME waste of time! Even better than YouTube!

Brandon

[A.T.T.R]

we all get a " hide from customer pass" where i work

you know we all have that one customer WE CANT STAND!!!!!

mine i use on this lady who asks to many questions ( usualy same qustion every time) and has 2 kids that scream and her solution is to tell one kid to watch the other kid ( never goes over well and shes over all bad parent)

the other guy i work with skips out on this one guy who claims everythings cheeper at the lfs down the street ( never true and the rare time it is the fish at the other store is sick or dead)

nother guy who used to work with us had a STALKER actualy sent him cards thanking them for "special nights together" that never really happened

crazy people are fun


still my fav thing is these hot shot guys and the g/fs// guys say somthing and you just correct them from teh side line
" yeah baby i used to breed dose tings ( reference to clown fish)"
followed by comment about how his tetras used to eat the young..

had fun with that one

i work at a fish/ reptile store and we get so many reptile guys who are so high that you smell the weed right when they walk in. so fun to mess with them

[yellowwatchmen]

Originally posted by A.T.T.R
we all get a " hide from customer pass" where i work

you know we all have that one customer WE CANT STAND!!!!!

mine i use on this lady who asks to many questions ( usualy same qustion every time) and has 2 kids that scream and her solution is to tell one kid to watch the other kid ( never goes over well and shes over all bad parent)

the other guy i work with skips out on this one guy who claims everythings cheeper at the lfs down the street ( never true and the rare time it is the fish at the other store is sick or dead)

nother guy who used to work with us had a STALKER actualy sent him cards thanking them for "special nights together" that never really happened

crazy people are fun


still my fav thing is these hot shot guys and the g/fs// guys say somthing and you just correct them from teh side line
" yeah baby i used to breed dose tings ( reference to clown fish)"
followed by comment about how his tetras used to eat the young..

had fun with that one

i work at a fish/ reptile store and we get so many reptile guys who are so high that you smell the weed right when they walk in. so fun to mess with them

[littlefish72]

Had a situation two days ago that made me embarrassed to be a human being......only because I know that being a human being myself means that I share some genetic material with idiots and that bothers me

Now the story: we get shark eggs from time to time and a customer that I just got through helping spies the shark eggs and asks "Now just what is a shark egg?" I give a simple yet kind of smartass answer because i get that question all the time "It's like a chicken egg but with a shark." Then I turn the corner because I was helping another person. When I come back around he says "Man, you're pulling my chain. Sharks don't lay eggs. Sharks are mammals." My first thought was "Did you just say that?......out loud?......in a public place?" I simply say "No." He turns to a high school kid that works there and asks "Aren't sharks mammals?" And the kid just kind of shrugs his shoulders. So my second thought was "WHAT!!! THERE ARE TWO PEOPLE IN THE WORLD THAT DON'T KNOW SHARKS AREN'T MAMMALS?!?!?!?! "Well what is a distinguishing characteristic of a mammal?" he says. "Well mammary glands would be the single defining characteristic of mammals," I reply. "Well don't sharks give live birth?" he asks like he just nailed me. "Yeah but it's a much different process. And other than having a notochord and some basic organs, we really don't have much in common with sharks." The guy leaves to pay for his stuff up front and I look at the high school kid and say "I'm sure you've taken Biology and you work at a fish store. How the f&^% don't you know sharks aren't mammals?"

Siiiiiiiiiiigh

[ILoveLlamas]

don't you wish the dumb people would just go away???
I teach the characteristics of mammals to six year olds at a marine bio summer camp, and they can grasp that they sharks are not mammals really fast!

[mr pink floyd]

ahh i HATE crazy people. this guy came in yesterday, even my boss goes, yea, hes a whack-job. he asked me literally 20 different times which pumsp would work best with his system. i recommended 2 koralia number 2's, and after that, he suggested compelly different things, i said its your choice, then he asked me exactly how to put them in his tank, where to put them, where his anemone was. he asked me about 5 times where to put them, every single time i said word for word "thats up to you"

he walked away, and came back 5 minutes later and asked where to put them. it took half an hour to get him to leave me alone.



theres this one guy we get... who actually listens. as soon as he comes in, all the other employees run up to him and we all focus on him, because he actually cares, its an amazing rarity.

[MrSquid]

Wow - I'm so addicted to this thread. I had no idea I've just poured through 7 pages.

I had a lady once buy a couple of damsels to start cycling her 55g. Tank had been wet for about a week and she hadn't had a chance to get fish for it yet.

The next day she came in with her dead damsels. While I was netting new ones for her I asked specifically if she had a saltwater tank - she said yes. So we replaced them.

The next day after THAT she came in with 2 more dead damsels. So I casually asked what kind of salt she used when she set up the tank - and she said "I don't know - it was the water that came from my faucet." Turns out she had a salt-based water softener - and thought that if she filled the tank from the faucet that her softener was hooked up to, then she had a saltwater tank. I don't think she ever did end up believing my explanation of a saltwater tank actually was.

Then there was the lady (who looked like she came right from her 15 minutes of fame on the Jerry Springer show) with the 10g tank in her shopping cart and a litter of screaming, tank-pounding kids trailing behind her. (I think one was dragging by an umbillical cord...) We were running a buy 1-get 1 special on fresh water fish, and wanted to buy 10 goldfish and get 10 free so that her kids could have "lots of pets". I explained cycling to her while she just shook it off and said "I really don't care about all that". I told her that these fish would all die quickly if placed into that tank - and out of respect for the fact that they're living animals, I'd sell her 1 small fish TOMORROW after she set up her tank today. She promptly stormed over to the manager and yelled at him saying that she'd had a bad day and the last thing she needed was me berating her and that I was rude and inconsiderate. What made me mad was that the manager actually sold her all the fish - making ME look like the idiot.

[zhenjw]

I'm sorry that from time to time I am that lame customer! Still learning, will try to do more research and ask less questions! Awsome thread .

[zhenjw]

Originally posted by Absint Reefer
on multiple occasions people have came in and told me their water kept disappearing so they took their tank down. I told them that Adam west has the same problem

it was the noid.

[littlefish72]

^someone please explain the Adam West reference

[BMW///M3]

Originally posted by littlefish72
^someone please explain the Adam West reference

Obviously you don't watch family guy you old geezer.....

[littlefish72]

I watch it whenever I come across it (I am more of a south park guy)..........I think Adam West is the mayor of the town or something.......actually I have no idea but he is on that show sometimes.............so does he evaporate or something? I am truly lost

and can I assume the old geezer comment is in reference to the joke I'm not getting?

[kstallbe]

Mayor West on Family Guy thinks there is some sort of scandal/conspiracy causing all the water in the town to disappear. I think this is in an episode when Meg is following him for a story for the school newspaper. Thats all there is to it, really.

[Ron Popeil]

Sorry,,, logged in on wrong account, this one isnt mine

[JJ21]

a bump to the top!

[tongareefer]

Great thread!

[kar93]

dont work at one but i heard this when i was buying some fish:

Customer " I bought one of those cool yellow fish cant remember the nameyesterday and it was dead when i checked this morning"

Worker "Yeah thats a yellow tang.How big is your tank"

Customer " 150 Gallon"

Worker " What fish did you keep it with?"

Customer " Just cichlids"

[customanimalart]

Originally posted by MrSquid
Wow - I'm so addicted to this thread. I had no idea I've just poured through 7 pages.

I had a lady once buy a couple of damsels to start cycling her 55g. Tank had been wet for about a week and she hadn't had a chance to get fish for it yet.

The next day she came in with her dead damsels. While I was netting new ones for her I asked specifically if she had a saltwater tank - she said yes. So we replaced them.

The next day after THAT she came in with 2 more dead damsels. So I casually asked what kind of salt she used when she set up the tank - and she said "I don't know - it was the water that came from my faucet." Turns out she had a salt-based water softener - and thought that if she filled the tank from the faucet that her softener was hooked up to, then she had a saltwater tank. I don't think she ever did end up believing my explanation of a saltwater tank actually was.

Then there was the lady (who looked like she came right from her 15 minutes of fame on the Jerry Springer show) with the 10g tank in her shopping cart and a litter of screaming, tank-pounding kids trailing behind her. (I think one was dragging by an umbillical cord...) We were running a buy 1-get 1 special on fresh water fish, and wanted to buy 10 goldfish and get 10 free so that her kids could have "lots of pets". I explained cycling to her while she just shook it off and said "I really don't care about all that". I told her that these fish would all die quickly if placed into that tank - and out of respect for the fact that they're living animals, I'd sell her 1 small fish TOMORROW after she set up her tank today. She promptly stormed over to the manager and yelled at him saying that she'd had a bad day and the last thing she needed was me berating her and that I was rude and inconsiderate. What made me mad was that the manager actually sold her all the fish - making ME look like the idiot.

I hate it when managers do that! No matter what your job is, and what you are "trained" what to do and what NOT to do, the managers go and make idiots of their employees that THEY trained. They make the customers happy and the emloyees mad.
PMO!

[ReefTECK]

You guys think working in an LFS is terrible, try working in the fish department of a general petstore! I've been there for five years while making it through college, and life at work is so bleak and mundane, alot of beginners, with a handful of intermediate hobbyists come through every day. The stupid stories could go on for hours!

The worst is the guys who think they're soo much better than you, because I'm here working in a pet store. They think they're so advanced for keeping their mushrooms and xenias alive and propagating for a few years. If they only knew....

So I gotta couple:

Girl walks in and asks me to bag her a damsel fish (holding a 1/2 gal bowl) I politely remark, "your not going to put it in that are you?!" She says yeah, so what? I go on to refuse the sale. She returns three hours later and says, "my neighbor has a saltwater tank, and I'm going to buy it for him." Do you ever just feel like beating the crap out of people? I could go postal I swear some days.

Guy calls on the phone, (totally stoned or something) "Dude do you guys have sharks? When people ask me this I want to just sting them up, most of them have no idea what the hell they think they are doing. I reply "no, sharks aren't really manageable as aquarium pets for the typical person, I've got bala sharks, and some loaches that they call redtail/black/rainbow sharks. He says, "What about great whites?" I remark, "The great white is an endangered species and to my knowledge has never been really successfully tanked." He asks, "Oh, don't they make like miniature ones?" I question at this point in utter dismay, "They make? Do you think that all of these animals are just created in a lab?" CLICK "idiot."

What's more remarkable than the idiotic stories, is these peoples total disregard, lack of empathy, or sense of reality for dealing with fish, let alone understanding that corals are not plants. I've got to admit my experience has en richened my knowledge, and helped me to develop an intimate understanding of water chemistry, fish disease, and animal husbandry far beyond a Lehman's comprehension. Don't get me wrong, marine science is a passion in my life, I work it, live it, breath it, study it, but someday I just feel like working at the LFS is killing me!

anyways....life goes on

[kizkiz]

[i]< and animal husbandry far beyond a Lehman's comprehension. [/B]

Interesting
I never knew the german goalie was a fish keeper