wizardgus substituted for an old farmer

[pnosko]

As I read this joke that a friend sent to me, I just felt like the old farmer's name was "Jay." Doesn't this sound just like him?

============================================

wizardgus had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back forty, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, basketball court, etc. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built.

One evening Jay decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end of the pond.

One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!" Jay replied, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim or make you get out of the pond naked."

"I only came to feed the alligator."

Moral: Old age and treachery will triumph over youth and skill.

[Rock Anemone]

[beerguy]

Originally posted by pnosko

Moral: Old age and treachery will triumph over youth and skill.

I use that line on my kid all the time. He's going to be taller than I am by the end of the year so it's important to keep letting him know that you can take him.

[kevlouie]

He's going to be taller than I am by the end of the year so it's important to keep letting him know that you can take him.

Dude I hear you, mine is 2.5 years old and 3.5' tall. I'm 6' 3" , but its looking rough for pops. (he's got his momma' temper too, holy crap)

[DJ88©]

$5 says his ears are burning right now.

[Agu]

Jay would never say that, he lives up north on the range, no gators there. Probably more like.

" cuse me ladies while I collect some o dem der leeches I bin raisin in dis here pond cus I'm goin fishin. Der big and nasty and dem muskies sure like dem bloodsuckers. Ya sure youbetcha "

Been der ,

Agu

[dc]

LOL, put a couple uff das in there and I'll buy that!

[Agu]

Uff da den, yasureyoubetcha, If yous hungry we gots the cassarole in da oben den, uff da.

Agu

[mnreefman]

as a fellow minesotian i can say that we dont talk like that,
your thinkin n.d

[Covenant]

As a Canadian who's been to Minnesota, I can say that some of you sure do!

[beerguy]

ooh and liike you've got room to talk eh?

[Covenant]

Hey, hey! I loved driving to and from Duluth just to meet real live people who talk like that! Eh? And I'm proud of my quirks of speech!

[dc]

Originally posted by mnreefman
as a fellow minesotian i can say that we dont talk like that,
your thinkin n.d

As a former North Dakotian---yes, yes they do! And if they move to Canada they say "Uff Da eh?"

[Agu]

mnreefman, uff da !! If you get out of the "cities" you'll find plenty of of people who speak "Minnesotan". And they'd be polite to those naked ladies too, while scaring them out of the pond .

DC, an acquintance of mine has personalized Mn plates, " UFF DA", he's the envy of everyone who didn't think of it first .

Agu

[dc]

LOL, I bet. My relatives just go Ufffff! Too tired to say the whole word.

[wizardgus®]

I can't believe I missed this! Mrs. Wiz pointed it out. She seems to agree with the consensus here.

BTW do you know the difference between "Uffda and Feeda"?

Uffda is when you drop the garbage, Feeda is when you step in it.



And here on the Range we use both Uffda and Eh sprinkled liberally in our speech. Also we pronounce Range, "Raintch"

As for the swimming ladies....well, I already told you the Mrs. is on to this thread.

[dc]

LOL, has she seen that 'other' thread??? You may have to sleep on the couch!!

[fahz]

wizardgus:

Ohfer mean I think these here people have been watchin Fargo to many times. By da way tanks again for da Anthelia i tink it almost doubled in size.

Minnesota home of the simple life

Fahz :

[wizardgus®]

Originally posted by dc
LOL, has she seen that 'other' thread??? You may have to sleep on the couch!!

Ah, yes, and I still don't understand women. It was determined that the couch was too good for me...it was the recliner that night.

[dc]

Originally posted by wizardgus
Ah, yes, and I still don't understand women. It was determined that the couch was too good for me...it was the recliner that night.

I think I like your wife!!!!

[pnosko]

What other thread?

[wizardgus®]

Originally posted by dc
I think I like your wife!!!!

Oh, me too. Have I told you what a wonderful, caring person she is? And when the light hits her just right...beautiful. (Of course you can't count on that light) And did I mention inteligent? Just the light of my life.

Blah, blah blah. Yadda, yadda, yadda. Can I PLEASE sleep on the couch now?

[joeychitwood]

Me and da wife vas up on da Raintch in Biwabik a couple a years ago skiing at Giant's Ridge.

Da wife she ordered a "White Zinfandel" at Vi's Pizza place, and da vaiter said, "Vat da heck is a White Zinfandel?"

Da wife said it vas a fancy new wine, to which da vaiter said, "Oh ya, ve don't got none of dat. Ya gotta remember dat your on the Raintch now!"

Now den, don't get me started, you don't wanna know then!

[Agu]

Joey, Uff Da !!

So didja get the wine cooler for da Mrs den ? Pink zin and 7-UP, ja it's a fancy wine drink den, youbetcha.

I thought Fargo was a caricature until I started listening to the people around me, uff da. The Coen brothers are from Mn btw.

Agu

[joeychitwood]

Agu, sorry ta say da wife din't get no White Zinfandel. Dat's just too bad, eh? But tings could be worse!

I live 45 miles from Fargo. As much as people there complained about the portrayal of the locals (the movie took place primarily in Brainerd, Minnesota) it's a quite accurate depiction.

Last summer, a woman from Tokyo flew to Minneapolis, took a taxi from the Twin Cities to Fargo, and then east to Detroit Lakes, where she began searching for the money Steve Buscemi buried in the snow near the endless fenceline in "Fargo."

She was found dead in the woods a couple of miles out of DL. She apparently died of exposure. No one has a clue why she thought she could find the fictional money here.

This summer, a Tokyo film maker is in town filming her story.