Dumb things you've overheard customers say at the LFS

[TANGBOY5000]

LFSs have been taking a beating here recently, and most of the time rightfully so. There are alot of LFS workers and owners on these boards so let's hear some things that customers say that drive you up the wall. I'll start off with some of mine.

What can I put with Piranhas?

Do you guys buy fish, I've got a 12" _______ in a 20 gallon.

Why can't I put a shark in a 55?

I can get this cheaper off the internet.

What goes with Goldfish? Goldfish. Let me get a red tail shark then.

What size tank do I need so that I don't have to change water?

You mean even with this expensive filter I still have to do water changes? That's crazy.

[edsiajb]

"Can you mix freshwater and saltwater fish?"

Heard this recently at a local shop...

[fishetcinc]

Here's thread I started on our local reef club that fits right in:

http://archive.reefcentral.com/forum...hreadid=531015

K.

[Cowman345]

"I have algae on my glass will an algae-eater eat algae?" - my mom.

[NM reef]

I once heard a man say to his wife....who was several feet away from him...so he had to speak rather loudly...."Honey do you think we'd be happy with a cleaner wrasse?"

Several folks within hearing range definitely had their minds in the gutter....me included!!!!!!!!

[mightymouse]

well i heard a kid ask when i was in petsmart one day picking up some food if he could keep a fire eel in a 5 gallon tank and i know this is freshwater but still funny fire eels have been known to get up to and over 2 feet lol

[keyhole]

A man was at the counter with his wife and said to the clerk, my wife gave me crabs for Valentine's day. I had to put in my 2 cents so I said at least you know where you got them. I got a very dirty look from his wife, and a surprized look from him when he realised what he said.

[nano10]

ladie - why can't i put that in my tank
clerk - thats a saltwater fish, you have a freshwater tank
ladie - so
clerk - you can't put a saltwater fish in freshwater
ladie - but its pretty

[Mr.Lloyd]

I used to own a pet shop and I kept snakes as well.I had a guy come over with a small hognose snake he wanted to sell for $5.I told him I would not give him 5 cents for it as I was taking an Eastern Kingsnake out of its cage.This guy holds his snake near mine and asks"Will they make friends ?"About that time my kingsnake popped this hognose snake and had it in coils in a flash.I put it back in the cage and told the guy to leave.

[fd235158]

I guess he didn't know much about king snakes

[tankslave]

I was browsing around the LFS the other day and this guy walks in with a PC fixture with the reflector and ballast, all covered in rust. You could barely see anything in the reflector. He says to the clerk, "I don't know what happened, it just stopped working" The guy couldn't figure out why the clerk couldn't stop laughing...

[ridetheducati]

"I have to stop at the local supermarket, how much salt do I need? Will Mortons work?"

The guy was planning to purchase distilled water and Mortons salt to start a nano from the supermarket. He was leaning against a stack of Tropic Marin Salt buckets. I had to take a deep breath.

[keckles]

A lady walks in around Christmas time looking for fish...

Lady: "I'm looking for a nice fish to give my husband for Christmas."
Me: "Do you have anything in mind, or would you just like to look around?"
Lady: "I'll just look around and let you know"

30 seconds later...
Lady: "Oh, this Dory is pretty." (Pointing to a blue tang)
Me: "Yes, and what size tank do you have?"
Lady: "It's a 10 gallon."
Me: "You probably need a tank larger than 10 gallons to keep that fish."
Lady: "No, my husband has been keeping his goldfish for a long time. I'm sure he can handle it."

I then gave up, and just let her talk to the owner of the store.

[RamPuppy]

You beat me to it keckles,

I must hear "Dory and Nemo" 3 or 4 times a day. It doesn't really bother me that much, but some of the other employees it drives nuts... should probably start a pool to see how long we can go without hearing it.

Also had a kid come in the other day wanting to put an arrowana in a 55 gallon tank. (For you salt only's, this is a very large fish that should not even be common in the trade, an adult needs a thousand gallons at least to be comfortable and have space to turn in.)

[keckles]

Yea, the Nemo and Dory stuff gets annoying really fast. The worst part of the story is that she wanted to buy her husband a blue tang for his 10 gallon goldfish tank

[TANGBOY5000]

NEMO and DORY, when will it end. It is the bane of my employment.

[DeeOooGee]

I'd like a refund on this fish.... (it is frozen, because they left it in the car overnight in sub zero weather)

[mummra100769]

a woman comes into fishroom pulling about five kids with her.the kids are yelling at her and pulling in five different directions and she says after she has had to much of it " WILL YOU GUYS STOP! ITS NOT LIKE I'M AN OCTOPUS, I DONT HAVE EIGHT EARS YA KNOW!" wow.

[Skatereef]

Originally posted by mummra100769
" WILL YOU GUYS STOP! ITS NOT LIKE I'M AN OCTOPUS, I DONT HAVE EIGHT EARS YA KNOW!" wow.

[TANGBOY5000]

C: My Clown Trigger killed everything, what can I put with it?
Me: I'd either return the Trigger for store credit or leave it all by itself.
C: Oh, alright. Let me get that Dory then.
Me: Ummm, for the same tank?
C: yeah, why?
Me: I just told you what you should do, and I can't sell you anymore fish for that tank.
C: You know how much money I spend in here, this is BS.
Me: Actually I can tell you exactly what you spend in here, it's all stored in the computer.
C: Fine I'll go somewhere else.
That guy had never been in our store before, which he forgot he mentioned at the beginning of our conversation. Why do customers always bust out with "Do you know how much money I spend in here?"? It never gets anything solved.

[ming81]

Me: Do you do water changes?
Customer: I put more water in when it evaporates
Me: What kind of water?
Customer: More saltwater
-------------------

Customer: Can you test my water and tell me why my fish died?
Me: sure
Customer: (hands me a bag of water with the dead fish in it)
Me: Wheres the water sample?
Customer: with the dead fish

[Lev F.]

One day at my LFS, a guy and his kids just got a new salt water tank, It was an Eclipse-29. once they loaded it into their car, heres how it went:

Daughter: Daddy, can we get a clownfish?
Father: Maybe next time, they're too expensive. (clowns are 29.99)
Father: I think we should get a couple of these Yellow ones (points at 4-inch yellow tangs)
Daughter: O.K

Then they gave their order to the employee, who immdiatley asked "What size tank do you have?" and then told them about the yellow tangs ect. ect. and they still bought them.

[jdav]

OH LORDY LORDY LORDY.... let meee seeeeeeee....


Ok here goes.

"My puffer is putting off this mucus and it has killed all of the other fish in the tank can i bring it back so I can get more fish".. he brought the puffer back in a bug 5 gallon bucket and my buddy at the stre tested the water(get ready).... 40/40/pegged ... oh and the ph was 7. then he comes back and hour later and says "that's not right my test kit at home didn't say that"

kid: MAMA ....IS TAHTU FEISH (talking about a angler)
mom; yeah baybe I think shees dead.
kid: oh

LOOK THEY EVEN HAVE LIVE ROCK!!!!! (as in alive like people)

that was just yesterday in a 30 minute span that I was in there....

I'll post more if I can think of them..

[PinkFloydReefer]

I want to know how I get knocked for saying things on my posts, but this guy says ****... and nothign is done! Im all for the moderators not being so anal, but If you are going to go around being snooty then be consistent!

[tanker]

This customer did not ask any questions but...

He was at the counter with a fish bowl, a white coral dead coral piece, a small box of IO salt and a bag with 2 clown fish. I can only assume.