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#1
09/09/2007, 12:18 PM
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ATTENTION PEOPLE: There is STILL No Cure For The Common Cold!
For the 100,000th time in my career, I had to break the news to a well-educated, intelligent couple here in the Emergency Department on a Sunday morning that their common colds must run a natural course, after which their symptoms will resolve.
This news is always met with skepticism, as if I secretly possess the cure for viral upper respiratory infections and am simply withholding it from them. People, trust me. If I knew how to cure the cold, I'd be running infomercials on late night TV selling my cure, and I'd be posting this from my own Caribbean island. I'm off to see the next patient. Hmmm, cold symptoms for a week..... |
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#3
09/09/2007, 12:22 PM
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Emergency Room? For the common cold?
OMG.... A nail shot up your sinus I could see... but this is an emergency? I'll bet you get a million of 'em. It's one bennie to being older than dirt---I must've exhausted the variations on the theme: I don't get colds, not in forever, like decades. Had a few bacterial sinus infections, but not the bona fide sneeze-and-wheeze virus.
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Sk8r "Make haste slowly." ---Augustus. "If anything CAN go wrong, it will, and at the worst possible moment."---St. Murphy. |
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#4
09/09/2007, 12:23 PM
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Hey doc-I've got the most awful stuffed nose, and sinus headache. And this terrible raspy cough, is there anything I can take for it?
  I just found out there is no cure for the most common forms of strep throat that kids bring home. Didn't bother a doc to find it out either, the computer is a wonderful thing!
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~~~Emily~~~ In order to really enjoy a dog, one doesn't merely try to train him to be semihuman. The point of it is to open oneself to the possibility of becoming partly a dog. - Edward Hoagland |
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#6
09/09/2007, 12:31 PM
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So Doc Joey, did you give them an ice water enema and send them on their way?
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Of course I could be completely mistaken. Ed: "I hate to tell you this Dr., but there aren't any fish in that river. In fact, there isn't any river." Dr. Lao: "That's ok. Me no use bait." |
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#7
09/09/2007, 12:36 PM
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Hey Joey........if you're workin' right now......you gotta tell us how the waiting room fills up about 30 minutes AFTER the football games are over !!!!
......it's amazing how horrible everyone feels AFTER they've watched whatever particular sporting even is on the boob tube that day !
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"What would you do if your legs got decapitated ?"--PoukieBear I look at her with my head tilted to the side and in a soft voice I just say; You're so pretty ! |
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#8
09/09/2007, 12:42 PM
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Re: ATTENTION PEOPLE: There is STILL No Cure For The Common Cold!
Quote:
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I drank some fish food but is OK cause it tasted GOOD ~ vr697getta The little men that live behind my eyes and scream into my brain told me to tell you hi. |
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#9
09/09/2007, 12:53 PM
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Quote:
How about now Joey? Now? Nnnnnnnnow?
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PC load letter? What the {bleep} does that mean? |
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#10
09/09/2007, 01:11 PM
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Quote:
Watch for my infomercial tonight on WGN. Just for you, I'll send you my book, vitamins and DVD for the low, low price of $149.95. But wait, if you call in the next 10 minutes (operators are standing by) the entire package is your for only $19.95. There's MORE! Pay with a credit card and I'll send you a free box of Kleenix impregnated with my miracle acne cure. |
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#11
09/09/2007, 01:12 PM
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Cure for the common cold: cheap whiskey, lemon, honey, heat and serve, repeat. You won't get over the cold but you may forget you have one.
Joey: howl! You forgot, the tissue should be returnable if dissatisfied....for the cost of shipping and handling.
__________________
Sk8r "Make haste slowly." ---Augustus. "If anything CAN go wrong, it will, and at the worst possible moment."---St. Murphy. |
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#12
09/09/2007, 01:15 PM
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Sk8r my Granny added hot tea to that mixture. It didn't cure us but I'm sure it made a bunch of whiny, snot nosed brats a bit more tolerable.
__________________
Of course I could be completely mistaken. Ed: "I hate to tell you this Dr., but there aren't any fish in that river. In fact, there isn't any river." Dr. Lao: "That's ok. Me no use bait." |
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#13
09/09/2007, 01:49 PM
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Quote:
Kevin |
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#14
09/09/2007, 04:19 PM
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Joey, I'm surprised you don't know the cure!
The cure is: chicken soup ginger ale rest rest rest
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-- Carrie -- Oh shut up, and kiss my fairy wrasse. ~Gawain1974~ silly girls make stuff hard ~drauka99~ |
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#16
09/09/2007, 04:43 PM
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Quote:
__________________
-- Carrie -- Oh shut up, and kiss my fairy wrasse. ~Gawain1974~ silly girls make stuff hard ~drauka99~ |
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#17
09/09/2007, 04:46 PM
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Quote:
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tony __________________________________ "Some people are like a slinky, they serve no apparent purpose, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs." |
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#18
09/09/2007, 04:47 PM
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Quote:
Amen!
__________________
~Debi~ Powertripping~is that a song or a dance? RC Lounge~Humor Questionable ~Enter At Own Risk! |
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#19
09/09/2007, 05:09 PM
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Our normal whine is "Can't you just go away and let me die in peace?"
__________________
Of course I could be completely mistaken. Ed: "I hate to tell you this Dr., but there aren't any fish in that river. In fact, there isn't any river." Dr. Lao: "That's ok. Me no use bait." |
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