reefcentral getting hostile? - Page 2

DgenR8 · #26 04/01/2006, 07:08 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by NCreefwannabe
Ive been on alot of hobby forums. Cars mainly, other fish sites, games even lol. This site is by far the nicest ive seen. If you really wan to see flaming on noobs.... go to Your post is in violation of the terms and conditions of use of this web site and has been edited. Further violations will result in revocation of your posting privileges. That place i left after 1 day. Horrible things happen to new guys lol.

I just noticed the link in your post. Let's just say not appropriate. Try to keep that in mind from here forward.

armagedon48 · #27 04/01/2006, 10:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by wfrost
I actually had a guy a couple of years ago when I was researching my first SW tank tell me I shouldnt get into this hobby if I couldnt afford to spend the thousands of dollars he thought was neccessary to buy all the best, most popular at the time gadgets.

if i could go back and time and tell myself how much i would spend in the next 5 months. i think id back out of it as well lol. i shoulda stuck with the 90 gal discus tank...

saltfever · #28 04/03/2006, 03:27 AM

People need to remember its a hobby and should be enjoyable. dont take it or yourself to seriously. No one is forcing you to post on this forum! If you have a problem and no good advice to give please dont post a reply to questions you think are stupid. Remember there are countless different ways to setup and take care of reef tanks. Your way is not the only way. It may be or may not be the best way. Be calm and dont rip people apart because they do thing diferent then you do. So far ive had a great experence here and my hats off to the RC staff for looking out for all of us. Thank you all and remember have fun.

jer1198 · #29 04/08/2006, 07:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by jpfelix
j if you don't relax you'll end up shooting someone for walking on your lawn!

that was an accident i tell you, i didnt know it was loaded!!

impulse · #30 04/10/2006, 01:18 AM

I subscribe to an Australian marine forum and it astounded me that quite a few "experts" were so narrow in their thinking and so venomous in their attacks on any lateral thinking. I took it upon myself to PM some of the newbies that were so under attack to offer some hopefully helpful advice. On more than one occasion, those that I PMed were on the point of giving up. What a loss this would be to our hobby. Thank God this forum has some restraint. Even if you disagree with a posting, what is the harm in doing so nicely? Flaming is not a sport!

DgenR8 · #31 04/10/2006, 02:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by impulse
Even if you disagree with a posting, what is the harm in doing so nicely? Flaming is not a sport!

Well said!

gnrlee · #32 04/14/2006, 10:52 AM

I'm not new to the hobby either, but I even get grilled by other members if I ask a question or post something they might not understand or don't agree with. I have a beautiful tank and it is doing quite well. Everybody at one time or another has almost given up on the hobby. I was at that point at one time myself. Thanks to good a friend that owns the LFS down the street and helpful members here on RC, my tank is doing great. This is the whole point of RC. Everyone that flames a noob, at one time or another was a noob too. It's funny how so many people forget that.

goda · #33 04/21/2006, 01:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by gnrlee
I'm not new to the hobby either, but I even get grilled by other members if I ask a question or post something they might not understand or don't agree with. I have a beautiful tank and it is doing quite well. Everybody at one time or another has almost given up on the hobby. I was at that point at one time myself. Thanks to good a friend that owns the LFS down the street and helpful members here on RC, my tank is doing great. This is the whole point of RC. Everyone that flames a noob, at one time or another was a noob too. It's funny how so many people forget that.

was he your friend before or after you found out you had salt water :P i have friends also at any fish store i go into who wants bussiness .

sorry had to say it. just me being stupid

all boards have flamers. ( rc just seems to have more because... it does have more its the biggest of all the sites) when you see some one flaming just think. this is probobly a guy who yells at people cause he thinks the louder he is the smarter he sounds

XeniaMania · #34 04/21/2006, 03:07 PM

This is one thing I constantly remind people of, we are reading words on a screen. You can not hear the tone someone is using, and whatever tone is used for that statement is your own interpretation in your own head. If you ask a question, and you read a reply and feel bashed on, you're going to think that person's using a bashing tone against you when in reality he isn't. It's very hard to just take words at face value because we're typically emotional when we talk to each other. That's why sometimes when I know I'm about to make a comment that can be taken negatively, I will add a word of positive reinforcement at the end of the statement like bro, or buddy.

One thing that I will say that will make me sound like I'd come down on someone, especially noobs, are the ones who just get the equipment because they got it cheap although it's totally impractical like 250W on a 10g tank? See, that can be taken as a bash, but truth is, it really is impractical! A personal friend of mine picks up a 29g tall tank, and asked me to convert it to a reef for him w/ flourescent lighting. Fortunately he's my friend and I can just laugh at him in front of his face w/o his feelings being too bruised, but again, ppl see a good deal before proper husbandry.

Sometimes we don't mean to bite people's heads off, but as more experienced hobbyists, there are certain things that we are aware of that you should not do at all. If a person is about to treat their reef tank w/ copper, and we know that's not good at all, and despite our best efforts to be nice, if that person still wants to do it, then what becomes the "responsibility" on our part? Do we just let them go and destroy their tank? Or do we take a firmer stance? These instances do happen on many occassions, and although it is "their" tank, I feel as an experienced hobbyist, to help save some n00bs from the agonizing growing pains that I've gone through. But then my "give up" statement is "some ppl just gotta learn their lesson on their own", and then they get upset at me for saying that...

goda · #35 04/21/2006, 03:27 PM

nicly said but jus tto be clear. what i posted about i ment things like "WTH ARE YOUR STUPID YOU NEVER DOTHAT" type flame :P

anyways. back to the tank ^^ check out my thread for the 130 im setting up and feel free to flame. a post is a post lmao

gobygoby · #36 04/21/2006, 03:31 PM

XeniaMania · #37 04/21/2006, 03:45 PM

Eyes are a bit hard to see..

mkirda · #38 04/25/2006, 11:27 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by wfrost
I actually had a guy a couple of years ago when I was researching my first SW tank tell me I shouldnt get into this hobby if I couldnt afford to spend the thousands of dollars he thought was neccessary to buy all the best, most popular at the time gadgets.

And this was really good advice, meant to stop you from buying what you thought was 'good enough' only to discover later that it really wasn't.

Most people I know who counsel this way have a closet full of crap, all of it replaced with the stuff they should have gotten in the first place.

It isn't hostile to Newbies, but good advice.

Regards.
Mike Kirda

goda · #39 04/25/2006, 11:56 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by gnrlee
I'm not new to the hobby either, but I even get grilled by other members if I ask a question or post something they might not understand or don't agree with. I have a beautiful tank and it is doing quite well. Everybody at one time or another has almost given up on the hobby. I was at that point at one time myself. Thanks to good a friend that owns the LFS down the street and helpful members here on RC, my tank is doing great. This is the whole point of RC. Everyone that flames a noob, at one time or another was a noob too. It's funny how so many people forget that.

i was never a noob
i was an ultra noob!

what about the fishers to what ever there called. people who try to start flaming on purpos
like
" iv had 6 tangs in my 5 gallon for a year no probloms" no real question just an obviusly stupid post ment to start flames

XeniaMania · #40 04/25/2006, 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by goda
i was never a noob
i was an ultra noob!

what about the fishers to what ever there called. people who try to start flaming on purpos
like
" iv had 6 tangs in my 5 gallon for a year no probloms" no real question just an obviusly stupid post ment to start flames

Desperate souls with a desperate cry out for attention I'd say..

goda · #41 04/25/2006, 12:02 PM

how should we handle them tho

flame em or treat them nicly just to get em ****ed that we didnt flame like they wanted?

( edit we cant say the other word for urination? now thats toooo funny)

XeniaMania · #42 04/25/2006, 12:05 PM

I just ignore them. Why bother...makes me look worse on my part.

goda · #43 04/25/2006, 12:05 PM

"20G Xenia tank; 9 species, Yes! Got my Torquoise"
you got any pics of those . i love xenia! ever see a blue xenia or is it just a myth / injected. if your ever intrested in selling any frags send me a pm. my big tank is almost ready for coral

XeniaMania · #44 04/25/2006, 12:07 PM

Fiji Blues..

You can see the torquoise on the bottom left corner of the image and the blue cespitularia in the center.

goda · #45 04/25/2006, 02:36 PM

nice. those are really cool looking

redrunblue · #46 04/25/2006, 08:41 PM

awesome xenia tank. I am new to reef central but not to reefkeeping. I have to tell you, though. The attitude which is pervasive, not by everybody but quite frequently found in many threads, is something I wouldn't have expected to find here. We're talking fish and corals here. Is it really a problem for you to try to help somebody out? And, why would you even bother posting something terse and unhelpful. I just posted on a thread that had an unfortunate title. "My regal angel is squirting." Yeah. That's a pretty bad way to start off a thread. But, some guy gets on and starts scolding the guy for killing fish and then makes a crack about his mother? Being a student of philosophy and ethics, it is a pretty absurd thing to get on anyone's case in a hobbyist forum for killing a fish while maintaining that you love them. The best hobbyist has killed more than his share and, while we are not the problem for reefs in the macro sense, it is pretty crazy to get on a public forum and protest someone else's murderous ways. If we assume everyone's intent is that of a hobbyist, then why speak to someone as if they were not likewise intentioned? But, again, truthfully (erg), the problem arises from the idea that we love these animals. We do not. We cannot. Otherwise, we would leave them alone. We love their colors and their majesty and we would do the same thing to a sunset if we could catch it, no matter how brown it turned. Mix a little of this confused intent, a little anonymity, and maybe, may I say, even a little guilt. (At least, I hope there is some out there) And, well, you've got people running around talking like they know something. I care for lots of fish and lots of corals and have spent lots of time in classrooms and really know very little. I'm not trying to end on some bland epistemological statement but the best of what we know really amounts to little more than this in and that out and how do we treat the disfunction along the way. We "know," in the sense of knowing a being, absolutely nothing of what we profess to "love" and, in general, couldn't care less. That said, don't take it too seriously. It's pretty. You want it. Buy it and do your best to keep it alive. As an admittedly new member, I'd like this to be the kind of place that can help you keep it alive for its sake and yours.

Maxwell

redrunblue · #47 04/25/2006, 08:45 PM

I just looked back at your tank. Awesome xenia tank.

impulse · #48 04/25/2006, 08:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by redrunblue
Mix a little of this confused intent, a little anonymity, and maybe, may I say, even a little guilt.
Maxwell

This is so totally true! Particularly the anonimity. This feature of internet forums in general leads to a speaking of mind that is sometimes quite cruel and rude. Imagine that you are talking face-to-face and maybe the advice will be a bit more civil.

XeniaMania · #49 04/25/2006, 09:20 PM

Thanx for the compliments Red. I would have to say though, there are different forms of "hostility". Like recently, I was at this guy's house dropping off some corals, and I'm watching his Sohal beating up every other tang in the tank. Then I come here and on another thread, there's multiple people wanting to add tangs w/ a Sohal. You can't help but get upset at times because these ppl obviously have not done any research about the Sohal tang, and being "aggressive" is a form of deterrent.

redrunblue · #50 04/25/2006, 10:51 PM

Hey xenia,

Your aggressiveness in responding to them is a form of deterrent? Is that what you meant? If that is what you meant then my opinion-and remember this is only my opinion-would be that this is not your place to deter them. Or, rather, that using harsh commentary as a means of deterrent comes at the expense of diminishing the function of the forum as a media by which information is shared. How many threads have you seen descend into back and forth bs. I've seen more than I could have ever expected. What about those that are deterred from bringing up the subject in the first place because they are worried about getting "flamed." The fact that there is jargon for this kind of thing is even surprising to me. Listen, this place is yours much more than mine, but I was drawn here because I thought this place was about sharing information among interested people. Aggressiveness can only serve to shut that down.

I guess the real issue that I am finding troubling about attacks in threads--and I didn't bring it up though I do find its existence surprising--is that, because of the relative anonymity which is allowed by the context of the forum, the "aggressiveness" seems to skip right over good-natured jabbing among people with mutual interests and morphs in an attempt to establish some sort of hierarchy. Which, itself, is probably a result of the relative anonymity of the whole venture. Anyway, interesting stuff.

I recently moved up to LA for Irvine. And I am an alum from UCI. Go Eaters, I guess. Wish I had met you when I was down there. Would have loved to have seen that tank.

Best Regards,
Maxwell