DeepBlue
04/12/2001, 05:16 PM
WHY THE CHINESE BETTER GIVE ME MY PLANE BACK:
by President George W. Bush
It's my plane and I want it.
Although it DID have a great many antenna-like thingies sticking out of it, that plane's main function was to insure us a static-free Superbowl show here at the White House. Oh, you Chinese KNOW it's not Superbowl time? Aha!
So who's been spying on who?
That collision by the Chinese fighter plane was a ruse by its pilot, Wang Wei, who then immediately flew to Miami to fulfill the dream of many young emigres -- TO BECOME A BUSBOY IN THE BEST DAMN COUNTRY IN THE WHOLE DAMN
WORLD! He now goes by the name of Pepe and will only speak Spanish. Oh, he's good.
If you don't release the plane, we'll have to dispatch the world-renown Rev. Jesse Jackson to China as special emissary, and you know what that means.
He's going to be all over your women.
With our ruthless capitalism and your access to slave labor, our countries have too much we can happily work together on. Why jeopardize that?
If you don't give that plane back soon I'm going to have to tell Vice President Cheney, and the news will drop that whale like a sack of hammers.
Do you want that on your conscience?
You know, Cathie Lee can get her duds sewn by kids in sweatshops in Burma, but she stays with China for sentimental reasons. That could change.
Having that plane back in the hanger would allow me to refocus my presidency on what is truly important -- getting tax breaks for millionaires. I mean, insuring that every child learns to read by the age of 40.
No plane, no more dim-sum Wednesdays back at the ranch. Ever.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I think george summed it up, just fine!
by President George W. Bush
It's my plane and I want it.
Although it DID have a great many antenna-like thingies sticking out of it, that plane's main function was to insure us a static-free Superbowl show here at the White House. Oh, you Chinese KNOW it's not Superbowl time? Aha!
So who's been spying on who?
That collision by the Chinese fighter plane was a ruse by its pilot, Wang Wei, who then immediately flew to Miami to fulfill the dream of many young emigres -- TO BECOME A BUSBOY IN THE BEST DAMN COUNTRY IN THE WHOLE DAMN
WORLD! He now goes by the name of Pepe and will only speak Spanish. Oh, he's good.
If you don't release the plane, we'll have to dispatch the world-renown Rev. Jesse Jackson to China as special emissary, and you know what that means.
He's going to be all over your women.
With our ruthless capitalism and your access to slave labor, our countries have too much we can happily work together on. Why jeopardize that?
If you don't give that plane back soon I'm going to have to tell Vice President Cheney, and the news will drop that whale like a sack of hammers.
Do you want that on your conscience?
You know, Cathie Lee can get her duds sewn by kids in sweatshops in Burma, but she stays with China for sentimental reasons. That could change.
Having that plane back in the hanger would allow me to refocus my presidency on what is truly important -- getting tax breaks for millionaires. I mean, insuring that every child learns to read by the age of 40.
No plane, no more dim-sum Wednesdays back at the ranch. Ever.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I think george summed it up, just fine!